Owned

Langar þig til að segja eitthvað, en þú veist ekki hvar það á heima?! Segðu það hér!

Owned

Postby Bjarkih » Sat 14. Jan 2006 16:27

http://www.jumbojoke.com/his_lengthy_excuse_593.html

The wife comes home early and finds her husband in their master bedroom making love to a beautiful, sexy young lady!

"You unfaithful, disrespectful pig! What are you doing? How dare you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving this house, I want a divorce!"

The husband, replies "Wait! Wait a minute! Before you leave, at least listen to what happened!"

"Hmm, I don't know, well, it'll be the last thing I will hear from you. But make it fast, you dirtball!"

The husband begins to tell his story:

"While driving home this young lady asked for a ride. I saw she was so defenseless that I went ahead and allowed her in my car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She mentioned that at she had not eaten for three days. With great compassion I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas that I made for you last night that you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll gain weight; the poor thing practically devoured them.

"Since she was very dirty I asked if she wanted to take a shower. While she was showering, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw her clothes away. Since she needed clothes, I gave her the pair of jeans that you have had for a few years, that you can no longer wear because they are too tight on you. I also gave her the blouse that I gave you on our anniversary and you don't wear because I 'don't have good taste'.

"I gave her the pullover that my sister gave you for Christmas that you will not wear just to bother my sister, and I also gave her the boots that you bought at the expensive boutique that you never wore again after you saw your co-worker wearing the same pair."

She starts to warm up -- just a little -- and he continues:

"The young woman was very grateful to me and I walked her to the door. When we got to the door she turned around and with tears coming out of her eyes, she asks me:

"'Sir, do you have anything else that your wife does not use?'"
Bjarki Hilmarsson
--
E34 520iA '90 --seldur--
E34 540 6 spd manual Touring '96 -- seldur :cry: --
User avatar
Bjarkih
Formúlubílstjóri
 
Posts: 3154
Joined: Wed 06. Aug 2003 00:57
Location: Akureyri 603

Re: Owned

Postby Helgi M » Sat 14. Jan 2006 16:37

Bjarkih wrote:http://www.jumbojoke.com/his_lengthy_excuse_593.html

The wife comes home early and finds her husband in their master bedroom making love to a beautiful, sexy young lady!

"You unfaithful, disrespectful pig! What are you doing? How dare you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving this house, I want a divorce!"

The husband, replies "Wait! Wait a minute! Before you leave, at least listen to what happened!"

"Hmm, I don't know, well, it'll be the last thing I will hear from you. But make it fast, you dirtball!"

The husband begins to tell his story:

"While driving home this young lady asked for a ride. I saw she was so defenseless that I went ahead and allowed her in my car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She mentioned that at she had not eaten for three days. With great compassion I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas that I made for you last night that you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll gain weight; the poor thing practically devoured them.

"Since she was very dirty I asked if she wanted to take a shower. While she was showering, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw her clothes away. Since she needed clothes, I gave her the pair of jeans that you have had for a few years, that you can no longer wear because they are too tight on you. I also gave her the blouse that I gave you on our anniversary and you don't wear because I 'don't have good taste'.

"I gave her the pullover that my sister gave you for Christmas that you will not wear just to bother my sister, and I also gave her the boots that you bought at the expensive boutique that you never wore again after you saw your co-worker wearing the same pair."

She starts to warm up -- just a little -- and he continues:

"The young woman was very grateful to me and I walked her to the door. When we got to the door she turned around and with tears coming out of her eyes, she asks me:

"'Sir, do you have anything else that your wife does not use?'"


Þessi er brútal en samt góður, hehehe :lol: :lol: :lol:
Ekki nógu margir
User avatar
Helgi M
Meðlimur
Meðlimur
 
Posts: 494
Joined: Mon 11. Jul 2005 18:45
Location: Reykjavík

Postby Jónki 320i ´84 » Sun 15. Jan 2006 04:23

Þessi er bara snilld :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Jónki
325i ´90 e30 M-techII
320i ´84 e30 Seldur
Vantar þig viðgerð á bílnum S:697-9021
Image
User avatar
Jónki 320i ´84
Rallýbílstjóri
 
Posts: 1494
Joined: Sun 08. Jun 2003 03:11
Location: Reykjavík

Re: Owned

Postby Hemmi » Sun 15. Jan 2006 12:07

:whip:
User avatar
Hemmi
Rallýbílstjóri
 
Posts: 1045
Joined: Fri 25. Feb 2005 21:41
Location: Spánn

Postby IvanAnders » Sun 15. Jan 2006 12:41

Hahahahahahaha
Alpina wrote:er þetta utandeildin eða hvað er að gerast ,,,
User avatar
IvanAnders
Formúlubílstjóri
 
Posts: 3733
Joined: Mon 02. May 2005 21:23
Location: 108


Return to Off-Topic umræður

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests