So what else did I like about the SLR? Its 617 horsepower for one thing. There's tremendous response. It really kicks. There's comfort, sport and racing shifts. And the racing shifts are faster than you can shift by hand. But paddle shifts are like putting your dick in a milking machine - it's more efficient but just not as much fun.

Compared to a McLaren F1? Well, there is nothing purer to me than the McLaren. No power brakes, no power steering. There's no substitute for lightness. The McLaren is literally the lightest go-kart in the world. You work the clutch, you work the brake. There's no traction control. Nobody's going to save you. You are responsible for everything that happens. It's amazing. It has all the best features of the cars of the last century. You get involved. There will never be anything like it again. It is the greatest experience in the world. This is more like the ultimate Mercedes. It is the best of both worlds. Think of it like having sex with an aerobics instructor. You're exhausted and panting and she's going, 'Are you done? Is that it?' I mean how many guys are as good as these cars?